I spend A LOT of time working on myself. I learn by repeating. By regurgitating what I've learned in my own words- as quickly as possible when it really feels true- so it sticks. These are just some of those things:
The only thing you have control over is your response to an event.
There are no mistakes. There is only opportunity.
Everything that life has thrown at me has given me a decision - I can wallow, complain and resist, or I can see that opportunity and learn something. Every time I have been faced with a major life event, I try to shorten the impulse to resist.
Everything is temporary. Relationships, jobs, health. What is good one day is bad the next, but it never stays that way. When I struggle the most, this is the mantra I repeat to myself. Live in the moment and enjoy what you have - be grateful and present. But when things get hard remember that they used to be good, and it could all change tomorrow.
You can look for challenges without being competitive. Better yourself in whatever way works for you. Don’t judge yourself against others, only against yourself. We are our own worst critics, so try to use it to your advantage.
I’ve struggled with quitting smoking over the years. I stop for a long time - and then a stressful event comes up and I go pick up a pack - because its the easy crutch.
Practice Self Improvement - and I don’t mean learning new software. Take a good look at the way you interact with others, your work ethic, your health both mental and physical. We get very comfy in our faults. I decided to grow up a bit and realized the little ways I was letting things go.
For example, I leave all the lights on all the time. When I’m home alone they make me feel safe, I like the warmth of the lights, lots of reasons. But I realized it would be worth it if I fixed some of these little bad habits. One month later, my husband texted me to say that in becoming an adult, we had the lowest electric bill in our entirety of living in this house. Now not only do I have a physical reminder of an actual worth to fixing my bad habit, I created an incentive as well. Go me.
Active meditation - My type A personality means I'm working on something, in my head, all the time. I can meditate quietly, but I did always prefer mindfulness meditation. Call it overanalyzing, but learning to understand these bad habits, negative thought loops, low confidence and work on them real time is WORK. I am hoping I'm finally starting to feel the benefits of this. So consider this a short cut. This is the boot in your ass. Stop reading and get back to work.